EPISODE 1 • Pilot - “The Engagement”
The series opens with Sophia, Dorothy’s mother, moving in with Dorothy, Blanche and Rose. Sophia had been staying at a retirement home, Shady Pines, but a fire broke out and it burned down. Meanwhile, Blanche’s latest boyfriend, Harry, proposes marriage. However, Rose, a grief counselor, has a bad feeling about their impending marriage.
EPISODE 2 • “Guess Who’s Coming to the Wedding?”
Dorothy’s daughter, Kate, comes to Miami with an announcement. She’s engaged to a podiatrist named Dennis. Dorothy is thrilled but her happiness quickly turns to anger when she realizes that ex-husband, Stan, is going to be invited. After 38-years of marriage, Stan had left Dorothy for a woman half her age. Dorothy threatens to make a scene at the reception which places Rose and Blanche in the roles of peacemaker.
EPISODE 3 • “Rose the Prude”
Having not dated since her husband died, Rose reluctantly agrees to go on a blind date. This date turns into a serious relationship when she is invited on a cruise which would involve sharing a stateroom.
EPISODE 4 • “Transplant”
Blanche’s sister, Virginia, comes to Miami for a visit and Blanche is convinced she’s after something. Later, while out to dinner, she learns just what Virginia is after: Blanche’s kidney. Meanwhile, Rose and Dorothy babysit for an infant.
EPISODE 5 • “The Triangle”
Dorothy is dating Dr. Elliot Clayton. Dr. Clayton makes a pass at Blanche, but Dorothy doesn’t believe her when Blanche tells her about it. After a fight over the subject, Blanche orders Dorothy to leave the house. When Rose tricks Elliot into telling the truth about the situation where Dorothy overhears, Dorothy breaks up with Elliot and makes amends with Blanche.
EPISODE 6 • “On Golden Girls”
Blanche’s 14-year old grandson comes to Miami for a visit and brings a new meaning to the term “generation gap.” Meanwhile, Dorothy studies for her French final.
EPISODE 7 • “The Competition”
In a bowling competition, it’s Dorothy and Blanche verses Rose and Sophia. If Sophia and Rose win, Dorothy will allow Sophia to go back to Sicily for a visit with an old beau and if Dorothy and Blanche win Sophia will give her a pair of antique earrings.
EPISODE 8 • “The Break-In”
After a Madonna concert, the girls arrive home one evening to discover their house has been broken into. This leads the girls to seek out means to protect themselves, including a security system, guard dog and mace. Meanwhile, Rose becomes so paranoid that the robbers will come back she goes so far as to purchase a gun.
EPISODE 13 • “A Little Romance”Rose has been dating Dr. Jonathan Newman and begins to think their relationship is leading to the altar. However she begins to have second thoughts especially since he’s a midget.
EPISODE 14 • “That Was No Lady”
Dorothy latest boyfriend, Glen, gives her a shock when he tells her he’s married. She surprises herself when she finds herself sneaking around to be with him. Meanwhile, Blanche unloads her old car on Rose in order to buy a new one.
EPISODE 15 • “In a Bed of Rose’s”
Late one evening, Rose brings a man home and they spend the night together. However, in the morning she finds that he has passed away. Even worse, she later discovers he was married.
EPISODE 16 • ”The Truth Will Out“
Rose is apprehensive about a visit from her daughter and granddaughter, since their reason for coming is to settle Rose’s late-husband’s will. Meanwhile, Blanche gets caught up in the tabloids of a society murder.
EPISODE 17 • “Nice and Easy”
Blanche’s visiting niece is a chip right off the old block when she dates a different man all night every night. Dorothy does battle with a mouse living in the house. EPISODE 8 • “The Operation”Dorothy is hesitant about having foot surgery just as she was scheduled to tap dance with Blanche and Rose at a dance recital.
EPISODE 19 • ”Second Motherhood”
Blanche is romanced by a wealthy suitor who she learns has several small children. This fact dampens his proposal of marriage. Meanwhile, Dorothy and Rose go to bat with the bathroom plumbing.
EPISODE 20 • “Adult Education”
Blanche’s psychology professor sexually harasses her when she goes to him for help on a difficult test. Blanche’s professor makes her an harassing deal: If she has sex with him, he’ll give her an “A” for the exam. Meanwhile, Dorothy, Rose and Sophia each try to get a hold of tickets for a sold out Frank Sinatra concert.
EPISODE 21 • “The Flu”
A week before an awards ceremony, Blanche, Dorothy and Rose each come down with a nasty flu, which compounds their arguing over who will win a prestigious award.
EPISODE22 • “Job Hunting”
When Rose loses her job at the grief center, she begins searching for other sources of work. Meanwhile, Blanche tries to lose a few pounds and Dorothy is excited when a man she once had a crush for, contacts her and asks her out.
EPISODE 23 • “Blind Ambitions”
Rose’s sister, Lily, must deal with life as a blind person after recently losing her sight. Meanwhile, the girls hold a garage sale in order to buy a new TV but find it hard to part with things.
EPISODE 24 • “Big Daddy”
Blanche’s father, Big Daddy, comes to Miami for a visit, with an announcement: he’s sold the family plantation and is setting out to become a country singer. Meanwhile, Sophia places a “curse” on a neighbor who refuses to remove his tree that fell over onto the lanai during a storm.
EPISODE 25 • “The Way We Met”
One night after watching “Psycho,” the girls find it hard to sleep so they stay up and reminisce about how they all came to live with one another.
EPISODE 26 • “End of the Curse”
Blanche is mortified after taking a pregnancy test which indicates she’s pregnant. Then after visiting her doctor, she learns the truth, she’s beginning menopause. Meanwhile, Dorothy, Rose and Sophia go into the mink breeding business.
EPISODE 27 • “Ladies of the Evening”
The house is fumigated and the girls move into a Miami Beach hotel. Previously, Blanche had won three tickets to see the opening of Burt Reynolds’ new movie and passes to the party held afterwards where they could meet him. However, on the evening of the opening, the hotel is raided and they’re mistaken as prostitutes. Dorothy, Blanche and Rose are dragged off to jail.
EPISODE 28 • “Take Him, He’s Mine”
Dorothy dumps a depressed Stan on Blanche but then becomes incredibly jealous when Blanche and Stan hit it off. Meanwhile, Sophia and Rose begin selling sandwiches on the Boardwalk but they inadvertently make an enemy of another vendor, “Johnny No Thumbs.”
EPISODE 29 • ”It’s a Miserable Life”
The girls circulate a petition to save a 200-year old oak tree which is located on the property of the most hated woman in the neighborhood, Frieda Claxton, who wants the tree cut down.
EPISODE 30 • “Isn’t It Romantic”
Dorothy’s old friend, Jean, comes to Miami for a visit and Dorothy decides not to tell Blanche and Rose that Jean is a lesbian. Then, after spending time with Rose, Jean begins to fall for her. Meanwhile, a new VCR prompts Sophia to rent “dirty movies.”
EPISODE 31 • “Big Daddy’s Little Lady”
Blanche’s father comes to Miami for a visit and has an announcement: he’s engaged to be married. Blanche is thrilled until she meets his fiancee who happens to be younger than herself. Meanwhile, Dorothy and Rose enter a song writing contest.
EPISODE 32 • “Family Affair”
Dorothy’s son, Michael, and Rose’s daughter, Bridget, each come to Miami for a visit and each of them become a little too friendly for Dorothy and Rose’s liking. Meanwhile, Blanche hurts her back in aerobics class.
EPISODE 33 • “Vacation”
The girls’ dream vacation in the Caribbean turns out to be far from what was advertised in the brochure. While the girls are away, Sophia romances the gardener.
EPISODE 34 • “Joust Between Friends”
Laid off from work, Dorothy searches for part-time work which leads to Blanche getting her a job at the museum. Then fur flies when Dorothy is handed the job of organizing a banquet, the duty Blanche was hoping for. Meanwhile, Rose finds a stray dog at the supermarket.
EPISODE 35 • “Love, Rose”
Rose places an ad in the personals column and she is let down when she doesn’t hear an immediate response. This leads Blanche and Dorothy to begin responding under the name Isaac Newton.
EPISODE 36 • “Twas the Nightmare Before Christmas”
The girls each plan to spend Christmas with their families but a series of strange occurrences lead them to spend Christmas together in Miami.
EPISODE 37 • “Sisters”
For Sophia’s birthday, Dorothy flies in her sister, Angela, from Sicily as a surprise. However, Dorothy’s the one who’s surprised when Sophia’s reaction is that of disgust.
EPISODE 38 • “The Stan Who Came to Dinner”
Dorothy feels sympathy for Stan when he tells her he’s going to have open heart surgery. However that sympathy fades when she learns of his many infidelities while they were married.
EPISODE 39 • “The Actor”
Dorothy, Blanche and Rose each vie for the attention of an actor in the local community theatre, who on the sly begins romancing each of them.
EPISODE 40 • “Before and After”
Rose is convinced she died during a throat spasm. This leads her to live her life to the hilt, totally disrupting the other girls’ lives. Then, when the girls complain about her new lifestyle, Rose moves out.
EPISODE 41 • “And Then There Was One”
Sophia readies herself for participating in a walkathon. Meanwhile, Dorothy, Blanche and Rose babysit for the walkathon participants’ children but when the event is over, a baby is left unclaimed.
EPISODE 42 • “Bedtime Story”
When the girls learn that a number of relatives are going to be visiting, they reminisce about times they’ve had to share a bed and strange places they’ve had to sleep, including a train station.
EPISODE 43 • “Forgive Me, Father”
Blanche and Rose plan a nice dinner at the house for Dorothy and her new boyfriend, whom she later learns is a priest. She later gets another shock when she learns he plans to leave the church.
EPISODE 44 • “Long Days Journey into Marinara”
Sophia’s sister, Angela, arrives in Miami for a visit and decides to move there, but while she’s looking for an apartment, Dorothy invites her to stay with the girls. This ticks off Sophia since she thinks that Angela is after everything that she has.
EPISODE 45 • “Whose Face is This, Anyway?”
Blanche is convinced that her beauty is fading after attending her high school reunion and discovers many of her classmates have had face lifts. Meanwhile, Rose is making a home movie for a class she’s taking.
EPISODE 46 • “Dorothy’s Prized Pupil”
Dorothy feels that it’s her fault when her prized pupil wins a writing contest which inadvertently signals the INS that he’s an illegal alien.
EPISODE 47 • “Diamond in the Rough”
While Dorothy and Rose are planning a hospital charity banquet, Blanche falls for Jake, the caterer hired for the event. She quickly learns he’s more blue jeans than black tie which prompts her to foolishly put a stop to their romance.
EPISODE 48 • “Son-in-Law Dearest”
Dorothy’s daughter, Kate is coming for a visit and has a big announcement. Dorothy is excited when she thinks the announcement is going to be that Kate is pregnant. However, when Kate arrives, her announcement is far from exciting. Meanwhile, Blanche and Rose stay up and watch an “I Love Lucy” marathon.
EPISODE 49 • “To Catch a Neighbor”
Two police detectives stake out the girls’ home to investigate the neighbors who are believed to be dealers in stolen gems.
EPISODE 50 • “A Piece of Cake”
While preparing for a friend’s birthday party, the girls recall past birthdays, including Rose’s surprise birthday party for Dorothy, a surprise birthday party for Blanche and a memory of Sophia’s birthday involving her late-husband Sal.
EPISODE 51 • “Empty Nest”
In this pilot for another series (“Empty Nest”), the girls’ friend Renee is feeling depressed and lonely with her children grown up and moved out and her husband’s workaholic habits.
EPISODE 52 • “Old Friends”
Sophia befriends an old man on the boardwalk whom she becomes quick friends with. However, his strange behavior signals that he has a medical condition, Alzheimer’s disease. Meanwhile, Blanche accidentally gives away Rose’s teddy bear at a garage sale.
EPISODE 53 • “One For the Money”
Sophia’s latest get-rich-quick scheme prompts the girls to recall other various get-rich-quick schemes they’ve had over the years including catering, a dance marathon and a memory of Sophia’s from 1954.
EPISODE 54 • “Bringing Up Baby”
Rose is shocked to learn that in her late uncle’s will, he left her his “baby.” However, she is quickly delighted to learn the “Baby” is a pig, but delighted is not a word to describe Dorothy, Blanche and Sophia, at least not until they learn that when Baby dies Rose gets a large sum of money.
EPISODE 55 • “The Housekeeper”
The girls’ search for a housekeeper ends when they hire Marguerite, a woman who appears to have mystical powers. However, when they fire her, a string of bizarre events convince the girls that Marguerite has placed a curse on them.
EPISODE 56 • “Nothing to Fear But Fear Itself”
When Rose must give a eulogy at her aunt’s funeral, she must try to get over her biggest fear in the world: giving speeches. This also brings up Dorothy and Blanche’s biggest fears: Dorothy’s of flying and Blanche’s of a recurring dream.
EPISODE 57 • “Letter to Gorbachev”
Rose becomes concerned about nuclear war when girls in her cadet troop draw pictures of a bleak future. This prompts her to write letters to Gorbachev and Reagan. She’s stunned when she gets a response and learns that Gorbechev would like to meet her.
EPISODE 58 • “Strange Bedfellows”
The girls try to help in a campaign to get Gil Kessler elected as a local official. To his advantage, his chances of winning are boosted when reporters snap photos of Blanche entering his home one evening while his wife was away.
EPISODE 59 • “Brotherly Love”
Blanche makes a move at Ted, Stan’s brother, the minute she learns he’s a neurosurgeon. She is furious when she discovers the only woman Ted is apparently interested in is Dorothy. Meanwhile, Rose is suffering from insomnia.
EPISODE 60 • “A Visit From Little Sven”
Rose’s cousin, Sven, arrives in Miami for a visit just prior to his getting married by arrangement. However, when Blanche plays a trick on her latest beau which involves Sven, the naive groom falls for her. Meanwhile, Sophia tries to renew her driver’s license.
EPISODE 61 • “The Audit”
Dorothy is stunned to learn that Stan’s tax problems are her tax problems since Stan is being audited for a number of years when they were still married. Meanwhile, Blanche and Rose take a Spanish class, each for different reasons.
EPISODE 62 • “Three on a Couch”
Constant bickering causes the girls to seek help from a therapist. This prompts the girls to reminisce about times they didn’t get along. The therapist concludes they should not live with one another.
EPISODE 63 • “Charlie’s Buddy”
A wartime buddy of Rose’s late husband arrives in Miami to see Rose, however he has more in mind than just a friendly visit. Meanwhile, Dorothy and Blanche haggle over the same dress to wear to a social event.
EPISODE 64 • “The Artist”
Dorothy, Blanche and Rose each secretly pose nude for a Hungarian sculptor who will unveil the statue at an art show opening at a museum. Meanwhile, Sophia brushes up on practical jokes to get back at a prankster at the Senior Citizen’s Center.
EPISODE 65 • “Blanche’s Little Girl”
Blanche is thrilled by a visit from her daughter, Rebecca, an ex-model who has now gained quite a bit of weight. Also visiting with Rebecca is her oafish beau who constantly puts down her weight. The kicker: she’s thinking of marrying him.
EPISODE 66 • “Dorothy’s New Friend”
Dorothy befriends a novelist, Barbara Thorndyke, who quickly infringes on Dorothy’s relationship with Blanche and Rose, who think Barbara is nothing but a stuck-up snob.
EPISODE 67 • “Grab That Dough”
Sophia gets tickets for “Grab That Dough.” The girls rush over to California just to make the taping. When they arrive at the hotel, the clerk doesn’t have any rooms and charges them $75 just to sleep in the lobby. They wake up to find their purses were stolen but Sophia kept the tickets to the game show in her bra. At the game show, Blanche meets two brothers who were big winners on previous game shows, so she advises Dorothy that they should team up with them. Rose and Sophia take that to mean they’re too stupid to play with them.
EPISODE 68 • “My Brother, My Father”
Sophia’s brother, Angelo, a priest, is coming to Miami for a visit and he doesn’t know Dorothy and Stan are divorced. In order to spare his feelings, Sophia convinces Dorothy and Stan to pretend to be married. Meanwhile, Rose and Blanche prepare to star in a play, “The Sound of Music.”
EPISODE 69A • “Golden Moments (part 1)”
Sophia announces her intentions of moving out and in with her son, Phil. This prompts the girls to reminisce about the good times and the bad times they’ve had together.
EPISODE 69B • “Golden Moments (part 2)”
As Sophia makes up her mind on whether or not to move in with her son, the girls continue to reminisce about the years they’ve shared together.
EPISODE 70 • “And Ma Makes Three”
Feeling sorry for a lonely Sophia, Dorothy allows her to come along on a date with her and her latest beau. However, pretty soon Sophia begins tagging along on every date which puts a rift in Dorothy’s romantic plans.
EPISODE 71 • “Larceny and Old Lace”
Sophia’s latest boyfriend, Rocco, claims to have been involved in the mob, so when the girls discover a bag of Rocco’s with thousands of dollars in it, they assume he robbed a bank. Meanwhile, Dorothy and Blanche sneak a peak at Rose’s diary.
EPISODE 72 • “Rose’s Big Adventure”
Rose’s latest boyfriend has just retired and she is ready to spend a whole lot more time with him, but his retirement quickly turns him into a couch potato. Meanwhile, the girls deal with remodeling the garage into a guest room.
EPISODE 73 • “Mixed Blessing”
Dorothy's son, Michael pays another visit to Miami and this time he has an announcement, he's engaged.
EPISODE 74 • “Mister Terrific”
Rose begins to date “Mr. Terrific,” a kiddie show host, who gets fired when Dorothy gets a part-time job as a consultant on the show, a job he helped her get.
EPISODE 75 • “Mother’s Day”
While waiting for phone calls from their children wishing them a happy Mother’s day, the girls reminisce about past Mother’s days.
EPISODE 76 • “Yes, We Have No Havanas”
Blanche’s latest boyfriend is a charming Cuban who sweeps Blanche off her feet, but she’s not the only one when Blanche discovers he’s been dating Sophia behind her back. Meanwhile, Rose takes a course taught by Dorothy in order to get a high school diploma.
EPISODE 77 • “The Days and Nights of Sophia Petrillo”
This episode does a study in contrast, Sophia’s busy day to Blanche, Dorothy and Rose’s lazy day. While Sophia, organizes a band to raise money, volunteers at the hospital and battles return policies at the supermarket, Blanche, Dorothy and Rose sit around discussing what they should do that’s constructive.
EPISODE 78 • “The One That Got Away”
Blanche is determined to sleep with the one man who has refused her once in the past. Meanwhile, Rose claims to have seen a UFO and gets the Air Force involved.
EPISODE 82 • “Sophia’s Wedding” (part 2)
Sophia and Max come back from their honeymoon with no place to stay so Blanche, Dorothy and Rose put them up until they can find a place. Meanwhile, Sophia and Max decide to restart the old business Max had with Sophia’s late husband, a pizza knish stand. However, Dorothy begins smoking again!
EPISODE 83 • “Brother, Can You Spare That Jacket?”
When Sophia accidentally misplaces Blanche’s aviator jacket (with the winning lottery ticket in the pocket!), the girls do a little searching. The end up trying to get it back from a homeless shelter. In the end, after noticing how badly the people need the money, they decide to give the winning ticket to the shelter.
EPISODE 84 • “Scared Straight”
Blanche’s brother, Clayton, comes to Miami for a visit and Blanche goes all out fixing him up on blind dates. However, when Rose learns the truth, that Clayton is gay, she is afraid to tell Blanche the truth about him.
EPISODE 85 • “Stan Takes a Wife”
Stan breaks the news that he’s engaged to be married - something Dorothy at first seems to accept. However, after Sophia falls ill, Stan comforts Dorothy which sparks old feelings in her and she contemplates trying to get back together with Stan.
EPISODE 86 • “The Auction”
The girls try to cough up enough money to pay for a new roof. Meanwhile, Sophia’s volunteer job at the hospital is what brings the girls a piece of inside information that could give them enough money for a new roof and money left to spare. The info is that a famous artist is dying, so the girls head to an auction to bid on one of his paintings.
EPISODE 87 • “The Blind Date”
After being dumped by her boyfriend, Blanche befriends a man at a bar and makes a date with him not knowing he’s blind. Meanwhile, Dorothy and Rose try their hand at coaching a kids’ football team.
EPISODE 88 • “The Impotence of Being Ernest”
Rose is crazy about her latest boyfriend, Ernie, but can’t understand why he doesn’t approach the subject of sex. When she forces the subject, she learns the truth, he’s impotent.
EPISODE 89 • “Love Me Tender”
When Sophia sets Dorothy up on a blind date, Dorothy secretly falls for the seemingly simple man, claiming “he’s the greatest lover she ever had.” Meanwhile, Blanche and Rose join the “Be a Pal” and become pals to two motherless girls.
EPISODE 90 • “Valentine’s Day”
It’s Valentine’s Day, and the girls are all excited until each one of their dates cancel at the last minute. This leaves them to reminisce about past Valentine’s Days.
EPISODE 91 • “Two Rode Together”
Dorothy wants to spend some “quality” time with Sophia so she takes her away for the weekend to Disney World. However, her attempts fail when a fed up Sophia storms out. Meanwhile, Rose and Blanche try their hand at writing children’s stories.
EPISODE 92 • “You Gotta Have Hope”
Dorothy is in charge of a hospital charity show and things aren’t going her way. She can’t find any talent for the talent show and her emcee has just cancelled. Rose’s solution for her problem makes things worse when the girls scour Miami in hopes of getting Bob Hope to perform in the show.
EPISODE 93 • “Fiddler on the Ropes”
Without the consent of the other girls, Sophia sinks their life savings in Pepe, a prize fighter.
EPISODE 94 • “’Til Death Do We Volley”
Dorothy’s old friend, Trudy, comes for a visit and this revives their old rivalry between each other. However, the visit turns tragic when Trudy suddenly dies and Dorothy blames herself.
EPISODE 95 • “High Anxiety”
After Sophia accidentally knocks a bottle of Rose’s pills down the sink, it is discovered she is addicted to them. She then must battle withdrawal when she can’t get a hold of another bottle. Meanwhile, Dorothy and Sophia are hired to be in a pizza commercial.
EPISODE 96 • “Little Sister”
Rose’s sister, Holly, comes for a visit and becomes quick friends with Dorothy and Blanche, and leaves Rose out in the cold. However, when Rose catches Holly with Blanche’s boyfriend and tries to tell Blanche, Dorothy and Blanche refuse to believe her.
EPISODE 97 • “Sophia’s Choice”
Sophia goes into action to break her friend, Lillian, out of “the worst nursing home in the city.” However, Lillian proves to be too much of a handful for Sophia to handle. Meanwhile, Blanche considers having her breasts enlarged.
EPISODE 98 • “Rites of Spring”
A week prior to a friend’s annual party, the girls debate on what they should do to improve their appearance. This leads the girls to reminisce about previous attempts to improve their looks.
EPISODE 99 • “Foreign Exchange”
Sophia’s old friends, Philomena and Dominic, come to Miami from Sicily for a visit and have shocking news for Dorothy. Philomena and Sophia had met in the hospital when they were giving birth and now Philomena and Dominic claim that there was a mix-up and Dorothy was switched at birth. Meanwhile, Blanche and Rose take “dirty dancing” lessons.
EPISODE 100A • “We’re Outta Here” (1)
Blanche, Dorothy and Rose return home from a play to discover Sophia in the midst of selling the house. It’s later discovered that a “for sale” sign was accidentally placed on the front lawn but Blanche begins to consider it after seeing the amount that she’s offered.
EPISODE 100B • “We’re Outta Here” (2)
Writer(s): Kathy Speer and Terry Grossman; Director: Terry HughesBlanche debates on whether or not to sell the house as her and the rest of the girls recall times they have spent together (via flashbacks).
EPISODE 101 • “Sick and Tired” (1)
Dorothy is feeling rundown, tired all the time and has a lack of energy. She is sure she is ill, but all of the doctors she visits tell her she’s fine. Meanwhile, Blanche decides to write a romance novel.
EPISODE 102 • “Sick and Tired” (2)
Dorothy continues to seek medical advice and turns to Harry Weston for help. Meanwhile, Blanche goes on a writing binge resulting in a novel that is less then enthralling.
EPISODE 103 • “The Accurate Conception”
Blanche’s daughter, Rebecca, has some wonderful news. She’s going to become a mother, through artificial insemination. However, Blanche is less then thrilled - she’s totally against the entire thing.
EPISODE 104 • “Rose Fights Back”
When the company that Rose’s husband worked for cuts off their pension plan, Rose must face the fact that she’s going to get a new job, one that pays more. However, she quickly finds herself dealing with something she never expected: age discrimination. Meanwhile, Sophia goes wild buying things in quantity at a Shopper’s Warehouse.
EPISODE 105 • “Love Under the Big Top”
Dorothy is in a serious relationship with a lawyer and jumps to the conclusion that he’s on the verge of proposing. However, his announcement is a shocker: he’s leaving law to become a circus clown. Meanwhile, Rose and Blanche put together a protest to save some dolphins.
EPISODE 106 • “Dancing in the Dark”
Rose has been dating Miles Webber, a college professor, but the only thing they seem to have in common is the dance floor. But when Miles invites her to a party, Rose feels like a fish out of water being surrounded by all his intelligent friends. Meanwhile, Blanche battles a dating slump.
EPISODE 107 • “Not Another Monday”
Sophia’s friend has come up with an idea that will change her life. She wants to commit suicide and she wants Sophia there to hold her hand. Meanwhile, Blanche, Rose and Dorothy become singing nursemaids to a sick baby that they are taking care of for the weekend.
EPISODE 108 • “That Old Feeling”
Blanche is visited by her brother in-law and is taken back by his resemblance to her deceased husband. She quickly finds herself falling in love with hopes of marriage.
EPISODE 109 • “Comedy of Errors”
Dorothy finds a list of things that she wanted to accomplish before a certain age and finds that she hasn’t accomplished many of them. So she decides to go after one of them, entertaining people. This leads her to sign up to do a standup routine at a nightclub. Meanwhile, Blanche finds herself battling the IRS.
EPISODE 110 • “All That Jazz”
Dorothy’s son, Michael, shows up on her doorstep with news that he’s separated from his wife and needs a place to stay. However, Dorothy quickly gets tired of his freeloading and dumps him on Stan. Meanwhile, Rose’s stress is getting terrible and is reluctant to talk to her boss about cutting back on her “things-to-do” list.
EPISODE 111 • “Ebb Tide”
Blanche is shattered after her father, Big Daddy, passes away. However, when she goes back to her childhood home, she gets into a big argument with her sister, Virginia, and decides not to attend the funeral.
EPISODE 112 • “Have Yourself a Very Little Christmas”
It’s the Christmas season and the girls are fed up with Christmas shopping in a heat wave. So they decide to buy gifts for the one person they pick from a hat. Later, the girls decide to serve Christmas dinner for the homeless, including a recently homeless Stan.
EPISODE 113 • “Mary Has a Little Lamb”
The girls take in a 15-year old girl who has just found out she’s pregnant and scared to tell her father. Meanwhile, Blanche’s prison penpal has just been released and is looking for her.
EPISODE 114 • “Great Expectations”
Rose joins a positive thinking group and tries to get a pessimistic Dorothy to join. Meanwhile, Blanche is scared to get serious with her latest boyfriend especially after he has a heart attack.
EPISODE 115 • “Triple Play”
Blanche tries to lure men by placing a fake ad in the paper trying to sell a Mercedes. Meanwhile, Rose has to deal with meeting Miles’ daughter who makes it clear she wants their relationship to be no more and Dorothy discovers Sophia is hoarding Social Security money, thanks to a computer error.
EPISODE 116 • “Clinton Avenue Memoirs”
Dorothy becomes alarmed when Sophia forgets the date of her wedding anniversary. This leads Dorothy to face the fact that Sophia is becoming more and more forgetful with age. After visiting a doctor, Sophia decides to regain some of the memories she has lost and decides to take a trip to Brooklyn and visit their old apartment.
EPISODE 117 • “Like the Beep Beep Beep of the Tom-Tom”
After visiting the doctor, Blanche learns that he wants to put a pacemaker in her. However, after the operation, Blanche is so scared of intimacy that she decides to give up sex.
EPISODE 118 • “An Illegitimate Concern”
Blanche is stunned when a man comes to the front door and claims to be the illegitimate son of her late husband. Meanwhile, Dorothy and Sophia enter a mother-daughter pageant at Shady Pines.
EPISODE 119 • “72 Hours”
Rose discovers that she may be carrying the HIV virus after learning the blood they used in her gallbladder operation may have contained HIV antibodies. What really gets to her though is the 72 hours she must wait before hearing the test results. Meanwhile, Dorothy organizes a Save the Swamplands charity.
EPISODE 120 • “Twice in a Lifetime”
Rose must decide between her boyfriend, Miles, or an old boyfriend who has just come to town and asks her to go to Europe with him. Meanwhile, fed up with Dorothy’s rules, Sophia decides to move out.
EPISODE 121 • "Sisters and Other Strangers”
Blanche and her sister, Charmaine, reconcile after a life-long rivalry. However, the reconciliation does not last long after Blanche reads her recently published book and realizes the heroine is based on her. Meanwhile, Dorothy becomes fed up with Stan’s visiting cousin.
EPISODE 122 • "Cheaters”
The married man whom Dorothy once dated re-enters her life and has news that he’s now divorced and would like to reconcile with Dorothy. Meanwhile, Blanche and Sophia become the victims of a con game.
EPISODE 123 • "The Mangiacavallo Curse Makes a Lousy Wedding Present”
The girls attend the wedding of Dorothy’s goddaughter whose father was once engaged to Sophia. Sophia thinks that the wedding reception is the perfect spot for revenge after supposedly putting a curse on him years ago.
EPISODE 124 • "All Bets Off”
Dorothy’s gambling problem resurfaces after a visit to the race track and she quickly begins falling in to debt and gaining apathy about her job. Meanwhile, Rose takes up painting and Blanche is insulted after a man she works with rejects her advances.
EPISODE 125 • “The President’s Coming! The President’s Coming!”(part 1)
An FBI agent investigates the girls’ lives for a possible visit from President Bush. This leads the girls to reminisce about times they have spent together.
EPISODE 126 • "The President’s Coming! The President’s Coming!”(part 2)
When the FBI agent announces that George Bush will make a visit to their home, the girls continue to reminisce and Dorothy quickly readies a list of points she wants to make to the president.
EPISODE 127 • Blanche Delivers
Blanche’s daughter wants to give birth in a birthing center while Blanche is preoccupied by the possibility of Rebecca delivering in a local hospital. Blanche doesn’t want to be embarrassed by the fact that her daughter was artificially inseminated.
EPISODE 128 • Once, in St. Olaf
Rose makes a stunning discovery while admitting a patient at the hospital. Meanwhile, Sophia has to have surgery but a mix-up occurs after the operation and Sophia becomes lost in the hospital.
EPISODE 129 • If At Last You Do Succeed
Stan has finally hit it big with a new invention but Dorothy still can’t be happy for him. Meanwhile, Rose and Blanche fight over some war bonds that if cashed could bankrupt St. Olaf.
EPISODE 130 • Snap Out Of It
Dorothy decides to help Sophia with the “Meals on Wheels” program and runs across a reclusive man who hasn’t stepped out of his apartment since the 1960’s. Meanwhile, Blanche’s birthday is coming up and Rose becomes determined to find out her real age.
EPISODE 131 • Wham, Bam, Thank You, Mammy
Blanche gets an unexpected visit from her childhood “mammy” (nanny) but Blanche is reluctant to even speak to her since she deserted her when she was a child. Meanwhile, Sophia hires a matchmaker for Dorothy who experiences a date with a convict.
EPISODE 132 • Feelings
Dorothy receives threats after failing a football star which means he can’t play in an upcoming football game. Meanwhile, Rose must deal with her dentist, who she thinks fondled her during her last visit.
EPISODE 133 • Zborn Again
Dorothy finds herself being wooed by Stan and it seems her old feelings for him are resurfacing. Meanwhile, Rose has to deal with an annoying co-worker.
EPISODE 134 • How Do You Solve a Problem Like Sophia?
After the death of a friend, who had been a nun, Sophia decides she would like to become one. So she joins a convent and moves out. Meanwhile, Blanche gets into a car accident with Rose’s car, which leaves Rose with a lawsuit.
EPISODE 135 • Mrs. George Devereaux
Blanche has a secret admirer and is shocked when she meets him - her supposedly dead husband, George. Meanwhile, Dorothy is being wooed by two men, Sonny Bono and Lyle Waggoner.
EPISODE 136 • Girls Just Wanna Have Fun...Before They Die
Both Sophia and Rose take advice from Blanche that lands each of them in hot water. Due to a drought in St. Olaf, Rose swears to be celibate and Blanche advises her not to tell Miles the truth. Sophia takes Blanche’s tips to lure a man to bed, but when she tells him she loves him, he doesn’t respond with what she hoped.
EPISODE 137 • Stand By Your Man
Blanche meets a man at the library and only after they make a date does she realize he’s in a wheelchair. Meanwhile, Rose wants to keep one of the puppies from Dreyfuss’ litter despite Blanche’s feelings.
EPISODE 138 • Ebbtide’s Revenge
Dorothy must give the eulogy at her brother (a cross-dresser) Phil’s funeral. Meanwhile, a feud between Sophia and Phil’s widow reaches a peak leading Sophia to reveal her hidden feelings about her son’s alternative lifestyle.
EPISODE 139 • The Bloom is Off the Rose
Rose wants more adventure in her relationship with Miles, so she signs them up for skydiving lessons. Meanwhile, Blanche’s relationship with an abusive man causes Dorothy to voice her feelings.
EPISODE 140 • Sister of the Bride
Blanche’s gay brother, Clayton, makes a visit to Miami with a surprise - he has found the right person to make a commitment to, but Blanche still can’t get over Clayton’s sexual orientation. Meanwhile, Rose expects to win a Volunteer of the Year award.
EPISODE 141 • Miles to Go
After hearing that a mobster has died, Miles reveals that he has been in a witness protection program. However, when it is revealed that the mobster faked his death, Miles must leave Miami and go into hiding.
EPISODE 142 • There Goes the Bride (part 1)
Dorothy has been sneaking around so that Sophia doesn’t discover that she’s been dating Stan. However, when Stan proposes, Dorothy must reveal the truth to Sophia.
EPISODE 143 • There Goes the Bride (part 2)
Totally against Dorothy and Stan’s impending nuptials, Sophia vows to not let the ceremony go on. Meanwhile, Blanche begins interviewing for a new roommate since Dorothy is planning to move out.
EPISODE 144 • Older and Wiser
Wanting someone to watch after Sophia during the day, Dorothy gets Sophia a job under false pretenses. Meanwhile, Blanche and Rose are all excited about being hired as models for a “Penny Saver.”
EPISODE 145 • Melodrama
Blanche wants to intensify her relationship with her infamous one-night-stand man, Mel Bushman. Meanwhile, Rose tries her hand at TV reporting: her assignment - a dog show.
EPISODE 146 • Even Grandmas Get the Blues
While babysitting for her granddaughter, a man mistakes Blanche as being the baby’s mother and Blanche does nothing to set him straight. Meanwhile, Sophia gets ready for the “Festival of the Dancing Virgins,” a celebration of mothers and daughters, but Dorothy wants no part of it.
EPISODE 147 • Witness
Rose has a new man, Carl, in her life but suddenly out of the blue Miles returns, still undercover in the Witness Protection Program. However, things get hairy when Carl reveals himself to be the mobster that is after Miles. Meanwhile, Sophia loses her glasses.
EPISODE 148 • What a Difference a Date Makes
The man who stood Dorothy up at her senior prom contacts her and they make a date. After learning why he stood her up, Dorothy unleashes her wrath on the person at fault, Sophia.
EPISODE 149 • Love for Sale
The girls prepare for the Children’s Hospital Bachelorette Auction and a reluctant Dorothy decides to participate. She is in for a quick surprise when Stan walks in and begins bidding. Meanwhile, Sophia’s brother, Angelo, comes to Miami, broke and with no place to live.
EPISODE 150A • Never Yell Fire in a Crowded Retirement Home (part 1)
The deathbed confession of an ex-patient at Shady Pines stating that she and Sophia started the 1985 Shady Pines fire means bad news for Sophia.
EPISODE 150B • Never Yell Fire in a Crowded Retirement Home (part 2)
Sophia can’t remember the events of the evening of the 1985 Shady Pines fire and decides to jump bail and go back to Sicily. With the threat of Sophia going to jail, the girls reminisce about good times they have spent together.
EPISODE 151 • Henny Penny -- Straight, No Chaser
Dorothy is in charge of directing a school play, “Henny Penny,” but when the cast is quarantined, she gets Rose and Blanche to perform with her as the leads. But when Rose reads the ending, she wants no part in the play.
EPISODE 152 • Hey, Look Me Over
Rose discovers an old camera of Charlie’s with some undeveloped film still in it. After getting it developed, Rose is stunned when one of the pictures shows Charlie in bed with Blanche. Meanwhile, Dorothy tries to get Sophia to have her hearing checked.
EPISODE 153 • The Case of the Libertine Belle
The girls participate in a murder mystery weekend and Dorothy has a ball when she solves a mystery. However, when Blanche is accused of committing a real murder, Dorothy will have to use all her keen detective skills to find the real murderer.
EPISODE 154 • Beauty and the Beast
Blanche is visited by her granddaughter, Melissa, and the only thing that Blanche has on her mind is Melissa winning a Little Miss Beauty Contest. Meanwhile, Dorothy hires a nurse to look after a recuperating Sophia
EPISODE 155 • That’s For Me to Know
Blanche learns from a city inspector that she either has to lose a renter or make modifications to her home which would cost $10,000. Meanwhile, Dorothy demands to know who the groom is in a hidden wedding picture of Sophia’s.
EPISODE 156 • Where’s Charlie?
After Miles gives Rose a friendship ring, Rose becomes convinced Charlie is trying to contact her from the grave with the message that he disproves of her relationship with Miles. Meanwhile, Blanche begins coaching her new baseball player boyfriend.
EPISODE 157 • Mother Load
Blanche begins dating a newscaster who has another woman interfering in his life - his mother. Meanwhile, Stan asks Dorothy to attend a counseling session with him. Once there, Stan begins begging Dorothy to take him back.
EPISODE 158 • Dateline Miami
It’s Saturday night and Dorothy being the only one with a date, prompts the other girls to reminisce about some of the worst dates they have ever had.
EPISODE 159 • The Monkey Show (Part 1)
A hurricane is brewing and it’s not just outside after Dorothy gets a visit first from Stan, with news that he’s over her and moving on with his life. Dorothy quickly discovers who he’s moving on with - her sister, Gloria. Meanwhile, Blanche and Rose hold a telethon to save a lighthouse.
EPISODE 160 • The Monkey Show (Part 2)
Dorothy discovering Gloria sleeping with Stan just adds to their sibling rivalry but Sophia has had it so she leaves just prior the hurricane hitting.
EPISODE 161 • Rose Loves Miles
Rose has had it with Miles’ penny pinching ways and decides to take Blanche’s advice and go out with her and some big spenders. Meanwhile, Blanche has been left in charge of Sophia while Dorothy is away, and Sophia decides this would be the best time to take a trip to Sicily.
EPISODE 162 • Room Seven
Sophia has an after-life experience, seeing her late husband in heaven, while choking on a piece of candy. Meanwhile, Blanche is distraught over the demolition of her grandmother’s plantation, so the girls travel to Atlanta. Once there, Blanche handcuffs herself to the radiator.
EPISODE 163 • From Here to the Pharmacy
A man, Blanche has no memory of, returns from the Persian Gulf with hopes of fulfilling the promise she supposedly made to him before he left - that she will be his and only his. Meanwhile, Sophia has Rose help her write up her will.
EPISODE 164 • The Pope’s Ring
The Pope’s in town and Sophia goes to his mass. When she goes to kiss his ring, it slips off onto her finger. Meanwhile, Rose is convinced Miles is hiding something from her, so as a birthday gift, Blanche gives Rose a detective to spy on Miles.
EPISODE 165 • Old Boyfriends
Sophia’s attempts at trying to find a man go awry when a man she meets through the personals has a shadow - his sister. Meanwhile, Rose meets with an old boyfriend from St. Olaf, one she can’t remember.
EPISODE 166 • Goodbye, Mr. Gordon
Dorothy is contacted by a high school teacher she once had a crush on. They quickly begin seeing each other and Dorothy is convinced his feelings are genuine. Meanwhile, Rose puts together a talk show.
EPISODE 167 • The Commitments
Dorothy gets wrapped up in “Beatlemania” and begins dating a Beatle impersonator. Meanwhile, Blanche begins to worry about her looks after she pulls out all the stops to get a certain man into bed, but to no avail.
EPISODE 168 • Questions and AnswersDorothy is all excited when she learns that “Jeopardy” is having tryouts in Miami. This leads her to begin cramming for the audition test and later proves to be an annoyance to everyone at the audition.
EPISODE 169 • Ebbtide VI: The Wrath of Stan
It is the annual “Buy Sophia New Shoes” day, and Dorothy is forced to take her. Blanche also tags along, mentioning that it might be fun. Meanwhile, Uncle Angelo drops by and Rose is there. Since she is trying to find a good story to report on, she is more than happy to hear Angelo’s story. Apparently, his apartment building is infested with huge bugs.
EPISODE 170• Journey to the Center of Attention
Blanche brings a lonely Dorothy down to the Rusty Anchor for a night of excitement. However, Blanche, who had no intentions of being pushed off, is thrown by Dorothy, who begins singing and instantly becomes the center of attention.
EPISODE 171 • A Midwinter Night’s Dream (part 1)
A full moon on Leap Year, prompts Blanche to throw a Moonlight Madness Party. However, her plans of being ogled by men go drastically awry when Dorothy gets all of the attention. Meanwhile, Rose contemplates marrying Miles after winning a free honeymoon to Paris.
EPISODE 172 • A Midwinter Night’s Dream (part 2)
The full moon and festivities prompt strange happenings, including Blanche’s jewelry being swiped, Sophia trying to break a curse, and Dorothy and Miles sharing a passionate kiss.
EPISODE 173 • Rose: Portrait of a Woman
It’s Miles’ birthday and Rose is planning on giving him a golf club. However, Blanche gives her an idea that would spice up her relationship - naughty pictures. Meanwhile, Dorothy begins a new job.
EPISODE 174 • Home Again, Rose (Part 1)
Rose, having missed her class reunion, lets Blanche talk her into going to one and pose as classmates. Once there, Dorothy has a crowning achievement of being named queen of the prom, as Cindy Lou Peoples, but the excitement is halted when Rose collapses and is rushed into heart surgery.
EPISODE 175 • Home Again, Rose (Part 2)
Rose undergoes a triple bypass and the girls fear for her life. Meanwhile, Rose’s jealous daughter, Kirsten, arrives and refuses to see past her mother’s strange living arrangement.
EPISODE 176 • One Flew Out of the Cuckoo’s Nest (Part 1)
Blanche has a date and tries to dump her visiting uncle, Lucas, on Dorothy. Later, to get revenge, Dorothy and Lucas play a trick on Blanche by telling her they’re getting married. However, when Rose announces she plans on moving,
EPISODE 177 • One Flew Out of the Cuckoo’s Nest (Part 2)
Dorothy accepts Lucas’ marriage proposal and are wed. The girls must say a tearful goodbye with Dorothy planning on moving to Atlanta. Meanwhile, Sophia makes a final decision on where she wants to live.